A reflection by Mary Lou Edgar for July 2, 2023.
My favorite poet is Robert Frost. I learned about him in high school when I was able to hear him read some of his poems. I was mesmerized. I know many of his poems may seem simplistic. They still rhyme – what’s up with that? I thought much of what he said was so applicable to a person’s life.
During the past few weeks, much has happened in our family and at times I have felt the need to just not think. I decided to read one of my favorite Frost poems, “The Road Not Taken.” Then, I looked at the readings for this week and thought about God telling Abraham to sacrifice Issac. Now, there was an impossible decision. I couldn’t even wrap my head around it. In the end, God intervened, but if I am to be honest, I don’t think I would have thought about being obedient. Thank goodness my decisions are never that difficult!
Frost’s poem was written in 1915 and I’ve read numerous opinions on what he meant, but to me, it means looking at choices we all have and deciding which way to go.
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
and sorry I could not travel both.
And be one traveler, long I stood.”
When I read those words as well as the rest of the poem, they spoke to me of the decisions I have had to make – or have already made — in my life. I read this poem almost like a prayer because when I read it, I feel like it was written for me.
We all are faced with decisions that impact more people than ourselves. As Abraham left with Isaac, did he think about how Sarah would be impacted by this? As a mother, that was my primary thought. As I look back at my life, so many decisions were made and then decisions became harder. When they were about my husband or my children, they were so challenging. Some of those were deciding to marry young, deciding to build our family with children by birth and adoption, deciding to move to Wilmington. We were young and had lots of energy. We thought we only needed each other.
Within the last three years, I have become aware of how I pushed God out of our decisions. Unlike Abraham, I thought I knew best. Some time ago, I was sitting with a friend and remembering a very important decision I made after Moni came to us. She was so fragile, and everyone we knew was concerned about her and us. I felt like I followed my instincts, giving her what she needed. My friend asked me if I had ever considered that the Holy Spirit directed me to provide the exact type of care my child needed. I began to consider this in prayer. Our decision to adopt her seemed simple; but she was anything but simple. It was good for the Holy Spirit to break through my pride (I believed I could accomplish anything) and see that I needed help. When I look back at what I thought was instinctual, I now believe I was being led to give my child what she needed. I am now counting on the Holy Spirit to help me again as she continues to improve.
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –
I took the one less travelled by,
And that has made all the difference.”
When the poem was written, there was a great deal of debate about what Robert Frost meant when he wrote it. Many think it is about decisions we each make, and some scholars felt that both roads were basically the same. They simply led people to where they were going by using different directions. I’m not sure what I think. I’m sure when I first read it, I couldn’t imagine that anyone would care. But what I know now is that if I have faith, I will find the way, even if it means going in a different direction for a bit. Like many of us, I don’t always listen.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Mary Lou Edgar, MSS, is a clinical social worker who founded A Better Chance for Our Children, an adoption and foster care agency that works to find permanent homes for children in the foster care system. Mary Lou was the Executive Director of ABCFOC, but she is now retired. She graduated from Neumann University and Bryn Mawr School of Social Work and Social Research. She and her husband joined SsAM in 2021.
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