Reflection of 9-9-2022 by Christina Brennan Lee.
On Tuesday, I woke with a good spark of energy. I had my first cup of coffee and tidied up the kitchen a bit. I went downstairs and started a load of laundry. Came back up and poured a second cup of coffee. Then to the laptop to continue writing this piece and WOW, the world completely shut down, well, OK, just my part of it. The power went out.
Turns out a very large tree in the park up the street fell over into the street and took many wires with it. I drank the coffee before it got cold and picked up a book to read and I had an all-too-rare just reading for-fun-day. BUT, along the way of the day, I started to think about other kinds of power that surges and then just fades to a stop.
One particular area struck me: our spiritual power, our sense of prayer power, our inner full and then empty soul moments.
What do you do when the power of the Spirit suddenly seems to be gone?
The inner and outer struggle can be very painful when that light dims or leaves completely, or it might lead to anger, frustration, depression, or more, especially if we’ve felt quite comfortable in our faith and our practice for a long time. There is no short answer as each of us have different situations and experience.
One possibility is that when you feel ready, talk to a priest and/or find a qualified spiritual director ~ a priest can help you find one. There are also professionally qualified Pastoral Counselors who are therapists that specialize in spiritual matters. Meanwhile, remember always that the lights that go out can return.
The power of the Spirit, of God, of our Christ never leaves from within us.
We just sometimes trip over the cord and pull out the plug. It’s not our fault. It’s not anyone’s fault. Like the dreary clouds that filled my home unexpectedly the other day, we all can have those times in life, long or short, where the inner lights are.just.out.
If your Spiritual Power and Light is still glowing, ENJOY, Be EXCITED, SMILE a lot. Express the JOY in all that you do and keep attending to the Presence that is lighting you from within!
If you are feeling alone and lost in a spiritual desert, here’s a piece I wrote a long time ago reflecting a moment of my own. Go well, take care, feel what you feel, breathe. The Light will come in its own time, and we are all here with you, wherever you are in your Journey in Christ.
O You of the Great Beyond, are You really “up there” or “down here” or both? I know people who have no doubt in Your presence, in Your whereabouts, in Your intervention and grace. What’s wrong with me? I used to know with certainty that You were in charge of the Universe. All According to Your Will. And then – right after that day – I had a question. My question led to wonder. My wonder led to doubt. I haven’t always been the best person I could be – does that make my Grace Account smaller? I wandered away. Now I want to find my way back. I know in my heart and soul that I will have something more in my life if I can get back to You. Please, help me, Great One, I want to find and renew my faith in You. How do I begin? I’ll try by borrowing from another and ask: Please lift my spirit to Your presence where I can be still and know that You are my God, with Your Son our Savior Jesus Christ and with Your Spirit Who will lift my veil of doubt. Amen.”
Oh, and as for the piece I was originally writing for today, stay tuned…
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Every week, Christina Brennan Lee writes the Prayers of the People we use in our worship services on Sundays. She also leads weekday prayer services and serves on the Vestry. Click here to see her People’s Prayers website.